After hearing postive feedback from many of my friends, I finally decided to watch "Its Complicated". I was leery due to the fact that I knew it had to do about cheating spouses. But I was surprised at how hilarious it was, yet unlike most of my friends I loved the ending. I related to Meryl Streep's character, Jane, on so many levels. She went from "Dream girl to Doormat to Dream girl" and didn't even know it.
Dream girl, because her husband saw her that way when they got married, then doormat because that's when her husband started taking advantage of her and cheating on her. And then Dream girl again, because it was at that pivotal moment when her husband saw her in a new light, like when they had first met. But the lesson here is that she never changed, she always was that hardworking, smart, edgy, classy dream girl, except she only changed in her husband's eyes, when he lost faith in their marriage and became greedy. Not only does her husband cheat on Jane, but then marries the mistress and then years later decides he isn't happy with his marriage and realizes that it was all superficial. He starts to see his mistress for what she is a good looking bitchy, insensitive woman, that really doesn't care about his feelings.
It is then that he finally realizes that his ex-wife is a great woman and decides to romance her once again. I still laugh at her face when she wakes up the next morning in the same bed with him. She is filled with disgust, because for her the love is gone and it was just one of those things that an Ex never wants to actually happen. She had moved on, but just lonely at the moment and acted. Yet her husband sees her as the Dream girl she always was and always will be. Unfortunately, I have to say that I can relate with Jane on so many levels.
There was a period in my life when I was a doormat, not in the most extreme sense, but where I was passive and didn't know my ex-boyfriend was cheating on me. Yet, after all the drama and bitterness I only grew as a person and learned from the experience, which ironically only made me a better person. Years later I too have received phone calls from my Ex telling me how much he regrets what he did and will do anything for me to take him back and give him another chance. While part of me doesn't believe him, the most important part is that the love is gone. I have moved on, but also choose not to rekindle that flame. Sometimes in life there are time frames for certain things to take place and if they don't happen within that time then they will never be.
A friend once told me that when a spouse cheats on you the betrayal can be compared to that of a rape and it is for that reason that I can definitely relate as to why Jane didn't take her husband back and was so disgusted with having an affair with him. She didn't go back to yesterday's baggage, but started fresh with a new guy, Adam.
My grandma has this saying, "mejor estar sola que mal acompanada". "Better off alone, than in bad company." After all of my life experiences I now understand more than ever. I rather be single than live in an unhappy relationship where there isn't 100% commitment. And just like Jane I too would of chosen Adam, well a much younger cuter version of course.
